I've never really been what I consider to be fat, but I have been overweight. Even when I've felt good the body mass index number told me a different story. Losing weight was never difficult for me until I hurt my back falling backward off of a retaining wall only to be cushioned by blackberry bushes. With limited movement and pain, I gained weight.
I've been eating very sensibly for about ten months and I've lost 22 pounds. Don't applaud, it hasn't been that hard. Mild activity, a little more sleep and eating sensibly have done it. Back to my epiphany.
I was eating breakfast at a new diner that opened up the street. The waiter was a friendly, jolly guy...and by jolly I hope you understand that I mean fat. I don't have anything bad to say about him so don't look for fat jokes here. He was a great waiter...oh and I think he owned the place.
I noticed that when he brought toast to my table it was thoroughly buttered. It has always bothered me to get toast and see only a small wet spot in the middle. I was always taught to butter to the edges. When he came to my table I complimented him on his buttering expertise and his response pricked my heart:
"Thanks, I butter it the way I like it."
I didn't eat all of the toast. I realized that I liked it the way he liked it and if I dared to finish the toast I would have to show up to work in stretchy sweat pants like he did.
I grew up poor and I think that contributed to a lack of discipline with eating. There were no opportunities to overeat growing up so I ate whatever there was. Today I count calories with no apologies and I eat with purpose. I actually enjoy what I eat much more and have energy in parts of my life that were missing since I was eighteen.
I have more exciting epiphanies in my life but none that match this one for simplicity. So tell me figuratively, how do you like it buttered?