Tuesday, May 06, 2008

Remember the ozone?

Remember that thing?

That thing that mysteriously surrounds our globe and protects us from the sun?  That thing...do you remember that thing?

When I was in elementary school I went through Jimmy Carter's then new ecology indoctrination and learned about how the lifestyle of my selfish parents was going to destroy the world because they were destroying the ozone layer.

Everything contributed to the demise of the layer.  You name it.  Spray-on Deodorant, shaving cream, the production of normal household items, dog farts, and whatever else you can think of.  I'd come home so mad at my parents for living the way they did.  Sure they loved me but not enough to keep the ozone layer and prevent our world from entering into another ice age.

Scientists were wrong.

People tell me this in response:  The science is so much better now.

Many scientists have come forward and said they were caught in a craze and they had the evidence to understand that industrialization was a blip on the screen compared to the real main culprit of ozone depletion...volcanoes. 

So Al Gore says that the last Cyclone that killed at least 50,000 people was the result of global warming and I can imagine all the kids rushing home to dispense some bullshit accusing statement on their parents for killing people in 3rd world nations.  Now who will make their running shoes?

By the way...Chile has had some huge volcanic activity lately so don't be surprised to hear about some more ozone depletion in the future...but it won't be linked to the volcano...like someone with really bad gas they'll blame it on you or the dog.

And don't worry...when I'm proven right I'll be happy to remind you of this post.

3 comments:

robert the grump said...

Don't make me drive my Prius over there and kick your ass.

McCain's Pastor, John Hagee, probably thinks the cyclone was God's will. Why don't you pick on him instead of an easy target like Al Gore (and that's not a fat joke).

You're inferring that Gore believes humans are responsible for global warming. I don't think that's his take. Global warming has many causes, the important consideration is that mankind is one of them and the only one we can control.

I don't think science was wrong about the ozone layer, either. Propellents and other garbage certainly do cause ozone depletion, though perhaps not as much as farting cows. Only the alarmists who predicted the imminent demise of humanity were wrong.

You sound just like Ronald Reagan when he offhandedly proclaimed that trees were responsible for air pollution. I knew you were a Republican.

Tracy said...

McCain's pastor is technically Dan Yeary as he attends North Phoenix Baptist Church whenever he is in Arizona on Sundays...which is never.

When I observe people who practice the religion of environment worship I look at their actions not their words...they want me to live like they're not willing to while profiting from the message. Sound familiar?

Gore should have his own religious tv network..."COME DOWN AND HUG THIS TREE FOR GAWWWWWWWWD!"

Im a Republican until the end of the month unless I'm going to the RNC.

Anonymous said...

My dog's farts do smell pretty bad though.