Sad and Busy

I've been working lately on the slow process of dealing with my mom's belongings.  Most things require cut and dry decisions...throw away....save....donate...sell.   Figuring out what needs to be done with the physical items isn't nearly as difficult as sorting out the emotional items.

I went through tax returns that covered the last 25 years.  I saw a financial history of my parents struggle to keep their heads above water.  I saw my own income as a teenager added to theirs to bolster what little we had.  It was a walk through the history of my life that I wasn't prepared for.

I never had to deal with many of these types of things when my dad passed away and now I'm handling items that belonged to both of them.  Emotionally it feels like I've lost them both at the same time.  It sucks.

I will be glad when this is over.