The economy - Part 2

I received 3 emails regarding wait staff at restaurants from former waiters and waitresses. One was from my own sister.

So I must clarify what I mean so my food isn't spit in before it's delivered to my table.

First you must understand that the restaurants I normally patronize are greasy spoons. They pay their wait staff very little probably because I pay very little and expect even less for the service and food I receive. I'm not picky and typically will eat anything.

Let's just say you're a competent wait person. You enjoy working in a restaurant as it fits the value of your time and satisfies all of the gratification you want from a profession. Hooray for you, you can wait my table anytime and you should expect an enormous tip. I do tip well.

So when the economy is bad, you find that as turnover in your position continues the vacated jobs are being filled with people who are competent and on the ball. You enjoy working with these people and they enjoy you.

Then the economy picks up and more and more jobs are available all over. Lots of people will shift around in vocations looking for what satisfies them and then service level jobs are left looking for jobs to fill. You find that you (remember, you're a competent person) is now working with people who call in sick a lot, don't do the sidework or ask you to do their section for you, don't get things right and make customers complain. You also see your own tips suffer because you work with...oh no...here it goes....complete idiots.

When I explained this to my sister (who has 10 years plus as a waitress and enjoyed it) she completely agreed. She just wanted to make sure that I wasn't calling all wait staff idiots.

My answer to her was this: No not all wait staff my dear sister, just you.

How I know the economy is recovering

When the economy was in the dumper I noticed that if I had any money and was at a restaurant or some other service industry place, the customer service I got was remarkable. I'd talk to these people and would always get the same story that went sorta like this:

"I just got laid off so I'm working here until I get my resume around or maybe I'll go back to school. Anyway, gotta pay the bills."

Following that conversation was always more competent service and I always wished them well because I knew they'd be successful in any endeavor because they had their act together. When the economy stinks more skilled people are thrown into the workforce and eventually occupy jobs normally held by idiots.

Today I have full confidence that our economy has made a full recovery.

First stop is to CompUSA. I needed a new power supply for my laptop and was looking at the universal adapters. The description on the back of the package was close to my laptop's model number but was missing one letter. I asked a guy if he could look it up for me. He told me he'd like to but he was sorta busy. I didn't get a "one minute" or "I can find another person to help you" but instead was told that he was 'kinda busy.' I told him that I was kinda not shopping there anymore.

Second I stop into Bartell Drugs to get a new passport photo. The guy at the counter doesn't know how to work the camera. He calls his manager over and they just play with the camera for a few minutes and finally she just takes off with it. He and I stood there for about 5 minutes when I asked him, "Could you get an ETA on your manager?"

He said, "I don't know where she went."

I said, "Can you go find out?"

He asked me, "What do you want me to find out?"

I calmy told him, "I want to know if she's figuring out the camera so we both don't just stand here."

He said, "Okay." He wandered slowly toward the back of the store and stood by the pharmacy just staring.

I left.

Third and final stop I was standing in line at a teriyaki place with two people who are likely itinerant workers from a large country south of the United States. (I'm trying not to say Mexican) After they order and talk to the Asian woman behind the counter they both roll their eyes because they couldn't really understand her.

I guess her broken English was offensive to these two who apparently both possessed a more superior form of broken English. Sheesh.

So friends, just ignore all of the normal leading economic indicators and take my word for it. The economy is alive and well.

Limericks - Get them while they're hot

I knew it was bad from the start
It began as just a small fart
It happened so fast
That short little blast
But alas it was only a shart

Screw that...limericks are too hard.


Here's a St. Patty's Day Haiku:

Your green overalls
To me a butcher's apron
So God Save the Queen

I barfed on my shirt
I'm wearing green afterall
Fun to be Irish

You try!

Whatever you do, don't blush!

I will tell you two stories about how I said something I thought was funny and instead of spawning laughter, my comment brought on a blank stare and a red face.

Story number one begins here: I worked in the gaming industry for years. During one lowpoint (as jobs were scarce) I was a lead for a group of testers that tested XBox games. It was sometimes a fun job and sometimes I just wanted to urinate on the floor to entertain myself. One of my testers was playing an action adventure game and he set down his controller and said, "Oh man they got me!" I looked over and wondered what happened. Then he said, "I had five guys on me at once." I replied, "That must be a dream come true for you." Everyone laughed...he blushed.

Story number two begins here: At a bakery it took a long time for the guy behind the counter to acknowledge that I was standing at the counter awhile. He finally asked, "Anything look good to you?" I replied, "I was just admiring your buns." I'm looking down at the sticky buns along the display counter. The guy behind me laughs...the baker blushes.

Don't blush! Please just laugh it off so we're not all left wondering what you're thinking. We don't want to know.

Law Enforcement

A local TV station obtained video of a routine traffic stop where a woman received a ticket for going eleven over the speed limit. She initially refused to sign the ticket (despite being told it was not an admission of guilt) and then was put under arrest.

The woman had already signed the ticket (at which point it is not known) but the officer persisted with his attempt to put her under arrest. She refused to get out of the car so he pulled her out of the car by force, pulling her hair. She was charged with resisting arrest, assault and obstruction.

The city for which the officer works has viewed the video and is comfortable with the technique that the officer used in handling the incident. I wish I could say the same thing.

I believe that the officer acted within the policies and laws, but is refusing to sign something really an offense worthy of arrest? You don't even have to sign paperwork to be divorced in this state, why should refusing to sign a ticket be a big deal? Especially when it is really just a promise to respond.

What amazes me is how the law is setup to arrest people who are just easy picking. If your house is broken into and your posessions are stolen, the police will show up and make a report and then give you a case number. The reason for the case number is so you can give it to your insurance company. How much actual investigation do they do? Aside from looking around to see whether the burglar dropped his wallet or left a signed confession you can expect them to do nothing.

Oh but if you don't sign a traffic ticket then you can be arrested and pulled out of your vehicle by your hair. There seriously can be no provision to issue a citation even without their signature? Can't they just do what UPS does and just leave a note saying it's "on the back porch?"

I'm just concerned that law enforcement has come down picking the low hanging fruit. Police do not investigate real crimes (theft or force), but instead aggressively arrest people who have done next to nothing, or what they have done is to themselves only (drug arrests).

In the end we're left with the erosion of respect for law and those who are charged with enforcing it. Maybe a change in focus would make people resent the police less so that the routine traffic stop doesn't become an overblown case of civil disobedience.

Harry Browne

Harry Browne died today.

Who is Harry Browne? Harry ran for president on the Libertarian ticket in both 1996 and 2000. He earned 485,798 vote in 1996 and was first candidate I was actually excited to cast a vote for. I knew he would lose but it didn't matter to me one iota. I appreciated voting for someone that saw the potential in our country that was untapped and restrained by legislative creep. In 2000 when the rest of you were trying to choose between Dumb and Dumber (Bush/Gore) I felt at ease voting for the guy both of them refused to debate in Boston. Most forget that the Libertarian party had 'major' party status in Massachusetts and by state law was to be included in all partisan debates. The debate went on despite a judge affirming his right to be included.



I met Harry when he visited in Seattle during the 2000 campaign and he was a very polished public speaker. I still have a copy of his book Why Government Doesn't Work and a video file of one of his TV ads that I donated to get on the air.

America lost a great man today.

Okay, now this guy pisses me off

A teacher by the name of Jay Bennish who 'teaches' at Overland High School in Aurora, Colorado was taped by a student giving what the press is calling a "rant."

Here is the Denver Post article

I listened to about a half-hour of his lecture to his students that was on a Colorado newsradio station here


I know teachers can often be taken out of context because they talk all the time and that teenagers can have oversensitive feelings if what they're hearing is diametrically opposed to their own sensibilities so I wanted to hear his so-called rant myself. After all, a social studies class should have a pretty lively delivery if high school students are expected to pay attention.

I have to commend the teacher for attempting to put context in his teaching. His students are learning way more than places and dates. I also like the fact that in listening to it is easy to discern that he has a passion for teaching. Most of the teachers I had in high school didn't like their jobs and it showed. This guy would probably only give up his teaching job for a talkshow on Air America or perhaps shining a statue of Stalin somewhere.

The thing that I find out of line is that his rant is purely his opinion and not academic in nature. I don't mind him giving his opinion but he only gives the other side's argument just to show its flaws. His argument has flaws too but he doesn't expose them. He's interested in his students being enlightened to the point of agreeing with him. In typical "progressive" fashion he loves freedom of choice as long as you come to the same conclusions he has...and then he calls it diversity.

Most of what he says is fine. I'm not a conservative and I'm not offended by Mr. Bennish critizing policies. I am offended that there are clear, substantiated, and respected academic opinions that are to the contrary of his rant and he is obliged as an 'educator' to tell those viewpoints. Fact is though he's a fraud as an educator as he probably only knows what he hears. I am not a high school educator but I am familiar with liberal/progressive, conservative, and libertine thought enough to present them in a way that can give students a real understanding. And as they mature and wiggle through life they can sort out these political philosophies on their own. I express my opinions here because it is my forum to do so, but education should not be like a blog, it should be like an open book.

His one comment alone where he stated on the tape that capitalism as a system is "at odds with human rights" is a complete joke and can easily be dismantled through academic reason.

For example Fredic Bastiat wrote in his book The Law:

Self-preservation and self-development are common aspirations among all people. And if everyone enjoyed the unrestricted use of his faculties and the free disposition of the fruits of his labor, social progress would be ceaseless, uninterrupted, and unfailing.

You could disagree with this statement just as you could the teacher's comment about capitalism but for the sake of learning couldn't you at least bring it up? Is there no opposing view that can stand up against such an intelligent onslaught that can only come from a public high school social studies teacher? Those of you who actually know any high school teachers are probably laughing now.

Look Mr. Bennish, I'm sure my tiny brain and humble intellect can't stand up to your giant high school teacher brain but forgive me while I try to simplify my half-witted response to you in the only way I am able:

If you were teaching my kid's class I would meet with you in a parent/teacher conference and I'd make you look like a blubbering fool in front of my child, your principal and whoever else wanted to watch. And then after I got you a tissue to dry your pathetic tears I'd explain to everyone that just being smarter than another person and talking over less educated people doesn't equal education. I'd then explain to my child that even your pathetic excuse for an opinion is something that should be heard, but in proper context in the face of some reasonable scrutiny.

Then you'd all stand up and give me a standing ovation for giving you such a rare learning opportunity and you would wonder how I was capable of this without the giant brain that our public educators possess. I'll leave that alone as one of life's great and wonderful mysteries.

Laughing in an embarassing way

I was sharing a story last week with someone during a meeting and I said something that made them spit their drink out while laughing. I'm not sure this had ever happened before in my adult life. What I said wasn't even that funny.

Here is an excerpt from the conversation:

Me: So my back was killing me...very stiff...and when I wrecked on the snowmobile it felt better instantly.

Person: So the snowmobile accident straightened your back?

Me: Yeah, apparently. Weird huh?

Person: Did you hear it crack or anything?

Me: No, I couldn't hear over my screaming.

Person: PPPBPBBBBBBBTTTTHHHHHHHHTT

Yeah, I didn't think it was funny either.

Arabs running our ports

Oh brother. Talk about a non-issue. Larry Norman was spot-on when he wrote in a song:

The politicians all make speeches
and the newsmen all take notes
and exaggerate false issues
as they ram it down our throats

I may as well let you all know now that I love model trains. I've had them since 2nd grade and have collected and enjoyed them ever since. I'm not a hardcore hobbyist but there is something magical about ruling over a tiny kingdom. Just an ego thing probably...but anyway.....

...the Dubai company that is referred to in the press as "The Arab Company" is known as DP World and they purchased a British company called CSX. CSX has been handling freight in our country for a long time. Know how I know this? I have model railroad box cars with the company name on it. The same people that work for CSX now work for DP World like any acquisition. If I'm to believe the knee-jerk reaction of many politicians I guess this would mean that my model railroad is about to be overrun by Islamic fanatics.



I think what surprised people is that we don't have companies in our own country to handle this. The United Arab Emirates is a country that has been slowly moving oil out of their economy. It is a country where Christians can practice their faith openly. It is a place that manages ports (by manage we're talking about operations and bookkeeping) all over the world. Don't freak out because these people are "Arab."

You may as well also know that the terms "Arab" and "Moslem" are not synonymous. Arabs are a semetic people (like the Hebrews) that are descendents from Abraham of the Old Testament. In contrast those in Pakistan, Iran, and Iraq are not Arab. They come from a whole host of other geneologies. To single out a group for simply being Arab is in a different way being "Anti-Semetic."

I for one am going to let these Arabs manage my model railroad freely and without prejudice.

Going Number Two

I've resisted this blog post for awhile as it is pretty childish and far less sophisticated than our venture into Halloween Haikus. What euphemisms do you have for this...uh...topic above? I'd love to see some original ones.

Here are mine:

Backing the old brown Buick out of the garage.
Making mud pies. (See post from Thanksgiving)

Your turn!

Black History Month

I'm not going to preach about this month and its importance or unimportance to our nation and culture.

I know most of you don't care about Black History Month but allow me to pass this advice along:

Never grow tired of listening to stories of people overcoming adversity and becoming great despite the barriers put all around them. Someday it might be you and others will need to draw inspiration from your story. Be ready to make your own history.

Oh, and have a good President's Day too.

Offensive Cartoons Part 2

I got a couple of emails indicating that my cartoon just wasn't offensive enough. So I modified the cartoon slightly but included a few polarizing characters. Enjoy, but please riot responsibly.

Offensive Cartoons

With all of the uproar going on in response to the offensive cartoon depicting the prophet Muhammad, I decided to enter in with my own provacative cartoon.



Let the rioting begin!

My fondest Valentine's Day memory

When I was in elementary school I enjoyed Valentine's Day immensely. Our class would always make mailboxes to put at our desks and then on February 14th, before we had our class party, we played mailman and handed out our Valentines to everyone, including other boys. Most of the time I made mine by hand (ya know...folded piece of paper cut into an ear and then folded out to make a heart) but one year my mom actually procured store bought valentines so I could be like the normal kids whose parents had money left over after feeding their children.

My fondest memory comes from 3rd grade. This memory is so profound that I virtually have forgotten all other events from this time in my life. Here's how it goes:

This kid named Matt was in my 3rd grade class and I always found him to be quite annoying. He'd sit by me during lunch and strike up conversations about whatever was on his mind. Looking back I see him as a nice kid but he annoyed me beyond my words to describe. At the same time I never turned away anyone who was annoying. He pretty much had no friends and I could tell making friends was difficult for him so if he considered me a friend that was okay. My situation was the opposite...I had more friends than I wanted.

Matt's grandmother was Japanese and he talked all the time about how he was going to bring some Japanese food for our Valentine's party. He brought it up all the time and was very excited about it. Each time he talked about it I had to resist rolling my eyes.

So February 14th came and it was the day of our party. I brought a small bag with my valentine's to hand out to everyone but didn't bring any food for our class party. This is when I was relieved that I came from a poor family because I really didn't want to be encumbered any more than necessary.

Matt brought his sheet of whatever it was (I'm remembering it being California rolls or something but at that time I only had the sophistication to call it "that Japanese stuff.") When our party started Matt started handing it out to everyone from this flat cookie sheet. He was holding one half of it and had the other end resting on a table while handing it out to everyone. He was so excited.

Now here comes the part that brings me the fondest memory. He started to pull away from the table but didn't grab the other end of his cookie sheet. What happened was he dropped all of his grandmother's food on the floor. It all cascaded down into a big sticky rice mess. I saw it all happen almost in slow motion as Matt yelled, "Oh no!" He was so bummed that his exotic party dish was now all over the floor of our classroom.

Why is this my fondest memory? I didn't have the heart to tell Matt how annoying he was and I would've felt like a jerk telling him. I also never would have had the heart to knock his sheet of food out of his hand and tell him to shut up either...but it was like fate smiled on me for the sake of my entertainment...albeit, at his expense.

Aside from laughing at Matt's misfortune I gave this girl named Michelle a valentine with Donald and Daisy Duck on it and both ducks were surround by lots of hearts. I'm sure she understood fully the subtle symbolism of the affection I had for her for about two weeks that year...until I became distracted by our new playground balls. Yes, I've always been that smooth with the ladies.

Happy St. Valentine's Day everyone.

It's almost real money

As the saying goes: If you rob Peter to pay Paul...you can generally count on the support of Paul.

You Conservatives that elected your beloved George W. Bush now have this legacy to hang your pointed hats on:

1. 2.77 Trillion Dollar Budget proposal. This number doesn't even sound real...it may as well be a gazillion dollars. Yet Bush insists he made some smart cuts to the budget. Here's a reminder for you thickheaded conservatives: There is no such thing as a fiscal conservative. You either think it's right to take money from some to pay others or you don't. If you want a smaller federal budget you must elect someone who is a fiscal libertarian. (No capital L required)

2. Debt up the wazoo. Congratulations conservatives, you now have more debt and a more worthless dollar to pay it off with. Good thinking.

3. You've shown that you can no longer blame liberals for 'tax and spend' politics. They are not above blame still because the modern-day liberal generally thinks that socialism would work if the right people were in charge...basically them. So if Conservatives are Tax and Spend and Liberals are Tax and Spend...what hope is there to ever get a handle on debt? Not as long as they're getting support from all of you. Some of you 'Paul's' are going to have to give 'Peter' back his money at some point and stop taking it. If you don't, Peter is eventually going to kick your ass.

To both parties: So as you're looking to 2008 please don't nominate another "we need to cut Government waste" pinhead...elect someone who understands the constitutional role of the federal government and can communicate it effectively. If nothing else he can just rip pages out of the Executive Order book while congress wipes their collective butts with your tax dollars. That would be an improvement.

Missed Opportunity for the Modern Civil Rights Movement

I'm saddened that at this point in history, some major players in the Civil Rights Movement are passing on. What saddens me more is that their legacy is being rewritten by the modern movement that calls itself by the same name.

I learned about the civil rights movement initially as a child. It was not discussed at school, but if it had it probably would've been wrong anyway. I learned about it from home from my mother who was mortified by segregation. Not because of the inequality necessarily but because the social cues it spawned kept her from knowing and speaking to people she thought were interesting.

I shared the story about how she cried from embarrassment when she got on a bus quickly from out of the rain to accidently sit in the seats reserved for "Colored Patrons." The black man sitting behind her just took the sign off of her seat and moved it back one.

My mother's other story was when she worked at a New Orleans country club. The wait staff (all black) got their tips at the end of the week because no one bothered to add it all up and distribute the money. She asked if she could do this in her spare time so that they could take home some cash at the end of the day. It was no big deal to her but they were grateful. Eating everyday at the country club for lunch was free for employees but she always ate alone. She finally asked if she could eat with the wait staff in the kitchen so it wasn't so lonely. My mom was not trying to bridge the gaps between racial lines, but just didn't like being told who her friends could be. She was from Seattle and didn't know any better. This is the way my mom tried to teach me about. It had nothing to do with race, but she emphasized "Don't let anyone tell you who you can be friends with or who not to like." I knew nothing of the individuals behind the movement that changed segregation forever.

To take the legacy of these great heroes of the civil rights movement and rewrite them within the context of our current politically divided time, does a huge disservice. To eulogize Coretta Scott King by taking swipes at the president was in poor taste and was a lost opportunity. It not only reduced the memory of her cause, but lost a great opportunity for all of us to understand the great sacrifice of her time.

Martin Luther King Jr. did not run down this country or claim it to be a major force of evil in the world. He proclaimed that the country simply hadn't fulfilled its promise of equality. He likened it to writing a bad check and having it come back with insufficient funds. His dream was to have the promise fulfilled and the check cashed so that everyone could stand together and proclaim that they were 'Free at last."

I'm not patting myself on the back for being completely free of prejudice...because prejudices are a part of my life. I've grown to appreciate what that movement has meant to this nation and to the many it has given opportunity...a lesson I should've learned long ago. A lesson that many should've had the opportunity to learn yesterday but probably did not.

A year of blogging

Blogmess is about a year old now. I started it to get feedback on the things that I wrote and continue to use it to entertain and be thoughtful from time to time. Here is the year in review from my blog.

I shared dreams about Aliens spanking me. I gave a tribute to the Pope before he died and suggested that people could win arguments more easily if they stopped comparing people to Hitler and instead compared them to Liberace.

I made fun of Oregon as often as possible and commented on all the holidays that dot the calendar including St. Patrick's Day, President's Day and the now famous 'crap candy' post from Halloween. I made fun of red staters and exploited blue staters for their stupidity. I reached a lull in April but picked right back up again.

I complained about taxes, President Bush, the Election, and Hospital Volunteers. I took cold medicine and then tried to blog...not recommended. I shared a rare appreciation for my brother and called for the legalizations of drugs.

I had explosive diarrhea on Thanksgiving and wished Veteran's a happy day. I made a movie and made a plea for people to stop complaining about offensive sports mascots. I shared immortal wisdom like: If no one gets the joke, then you're basically just cross-dressing. Hey, don't forget Halloween Haikus. Fun! You all helped me go get a real tree and I enjoyed it...even though Christmas sorta sucked anyway.

All in all, a great year of blogging. Let's do it again.

Sudafed

This morning I signed for Sudafed and had the pharmacy take my ID so they could make a log of me buying this cold medicine. This is what you have to do in Washington State because the drug is not simply an effective cold reliever but an active ingredient in meth.

The pharmacist said, "Sorry, I have to ask for your ID, this is truly the dumbest law in the world."

I asked him, "Has making the log made a difference?"

He said, "No, in fact it does no good at all. We have the same people in here all the time and it doesn't stop them. So we make you wait in line and bother you with all of this just because you have post-nasal drip." I let him continue.

"I called the police and showed them the log and told them that if they stopped this guy in the parking lot he'd probably have 30 boxes of sudafed in his car. They didn't care and they didn't do anything about it. This law is pointless."

I signed for my cold medicine and had my Washington State Driver's License recorded and then walked away. Here's my full take on the situation:

1. Lawmakers should really consider talking to the police...not police unions, but actual beat cops and ask them if they'll likely enforce a law if it were put on the books. They'd probably be surprised to hear that most laws are not enforced and the police has no interest in doing so...not to mention the lack of resources.

2. What an adult decides to put in his own body is his own business. This goes for both pot and sudafed.

3. Since stores are requiring signatures and ID checks, the meth problem has not gone away in this state.

4. Our state spends millions of dollars in anti-smoking campaigns while the product is completely legal...then makes me sign for a completely legal cold product...all while not enforcing our own controlled substance laws.

5. The war on drugs is lost. The drugs have won. All must bow down to our new drug rulers and surrender our citizenship. Just kidding, sorta.

The Real State of the Union

If you catch the president making the State of the Union speech tonight, try listening to it through the filter of some realities that probably won't be mentioned...not even by the useless Democrat response. I'm a libertarian...I don't carry water for either party. This is how I see the state of our union.

The baby boomers are a disproportionately large demographic in this country that are demanding an unprecedented level of benefits (read: entitlements) from the United States Government. Without intervention we will go broke meeting their alleged needs.

Acting as the world's policemen we must maintain a military force designed for National Offense instead of National Defense. This is not only expensive but requires our country to have standing Armies in dozens of nations around the world.

We continue to mount debt because we spend more than we take in through tarriffs, excise taxes, and the income tax. We print money to buy bonds to offset our debt and rely on the voluntary devaluation of currency from our great friends China to sustain our more and more worthless US Dollar.

We worry about Roe v. Wade, which would hardly impact the laws that most states have on the books if it were overturned, while Social Security continues to be a broken, pay-as-you-go system designed for the year 1929 and not 2006.

Most citizens are concerned with illegal immigration though we refuse to create and maintain a provision for large amount of workers from other countries (trying not to say Mexico) to make a living here. The same agency tasked with deporting immigrants is also tasked with giving them proper documentation. Is it any wonder they don't bother to be documented?

We continue to trade with too few nations. As once said, "If good and services do not cross borders, eventually armies will." Trade is an ignored key to peace.

Lastly, with all of our problems...we're still better than Canada.

May God continue to bless the United States of America.

Hamas will eventually lighten up

All I've read in the news lately is about how the middle-east and the Palestine area is in a state of panic over the Hamas party victory in the recent Palestinian parliamentary elections.

Now that they're in power their focus will eventually have to turn from 'Death to Israel' to 'Let's try to keep the lights on and have the garbage trucks rolling.' Right now Hamas is saying all sorts of goofy things like wanting their militants to be used in the military and demanding that Israel change their flag. They are new at this and are feeling out their power structure. Eventually they'll be discussing things like campaigning to keep power, foreign diplomacy, etc...and their role will be that of a meddling government before long.

I'm not saying that they'll eventually be friends with Israel, but the nature of political power will eventually get the best of them and they'll seek to preserve their power instead of wage war with their neighbor.

Who knows, maybe they'll get an NHL Hockey franchise...they can be the Palestine Pythons or something.